The Shared Journey

SJ Was Sad…

Dear TSJ Peeps,

I hope you have enjoyed a safe and happy Fourth of July weekend. Perhaps you are still on vacation now! If so, Solomon’s advice is to truly “lie down in green pastures” (or on the beach or in a lounging chair somewhere of your choice) and tune out your worries so you can relax and restore your dreams and energy.

Solomon and I actually considered taking a day off ourselves.  We know it is important for everyone to do so from time to time. But just as I was beginning to send WW readers a notice, another voice was heard in TSJ headquarters!

Solomon Junior (SJ) spoke out and asked if he could have a turn telling Ms. Margie and her peeps something. Solomon was delighted.

Solomon then told me recently SJ has been fretting about going on to the next level of studies. (He is home schooled by Solomon). Solomon has tried to reassure him that he will be fine and is perfectly capable of making this change.

But the next level involves some changes that worry SJ, such as meeting new sheep, making new friends, having new teachers and playing in a different field (playground).

SJ admitted he only likes changes he asks for.  He does not really look forward to the ones imposed on him by his grown-up shepherds.

Solomon is very aware that SJ does not really trust himself or Solomon. Truthfully, SJ thinks his great-grandfather is old and does not remember what it feels like to be a youth.

So this morning, Solomon sighed a heavy sigh and nodded for me to write something down for SJ saying, “He is all yours, Ms. Margie. It seems he wants to share some thoughts with you and the peeps.”

Solomon is now taking a snooze.

So SJ Spoke Up…

” I don’t really have a lot to say, Ms. Margie, because I am young and probably not very wise at all. (SJ seemed a bit downcast). But, he added . . .  I do have feelings about things.

Solomon tells me that he loves me and he knows what is best for me. And all I have to do is trust he knows what I need and what I can do.  He also tells me no matter what happens I need to learn to trust in Chief Shepherd. He acts like that should be easy. Well, it is not so easy.

And, Ms. Margie,  I do sometimes think Gtreat-Grandfather Solomon has forgotten what it is like to have no say about certain matters. I also think he has forgotten what it feels like to walk straight into the field of uncertainty.  He always seems so calm and so very certain that everything will turn out all right. Maybe that works for old sheep.

I am sure we can all relate to Solomon as a parent figure and SJ as the one who is being told things are going to change.

Children often really are our teachers. I recently was chatting with a nine year old girl who told me she was “happy on the outside, but sad on the inside.”  Can you relate?

She is rather precocious in her ability to articulate mixed emotions. But she spoke for children of all ages. And she was speaking her truth. She was facing a move . . . a change she neither asked for nor wants. She is worried.

I have learned in my counseling and coaching career that so often peeps seem do seem happy on the outside when they are deeply troubled about something on the inside (away from our view).

When we look at others and they seem to “‘have it all” it its tempting to assume they are happy. And many times they are. But oh so many peeps often experience inner sadness and worries. Perhaps you too are struggling. Just like the youngster, we can distract ourselves with activities that bring momentary happiness, but beneath it all we carry heavy burdens.

SJ is right. Changes imposed on us are hard. Uncertainty makes us uneasy.

And we too have our doubts that anyone really has our best interest in mind: even God, our Chief Shepherd, though He  promises to provide for our needs. Often that seems clear only with hindsight. It takes faith to believe it going forward, especially since there is no promise of freedom from suffering! Yet suffering itself is greatly reduced when we are more like SJ’s great-grandfather Solomon, who has learned to focus on his resources rather than on the worries. And who truly trusts the Chief Shepherd knows and loves him.

So while Solomon is snoozing, SJ is to be commended for acknowledging his honest feelings. And he already seems relieved to hear that he is very normal. He wants me to thank the girl who really said it for him, “Sometimes I am happy on the outside, but sad on the inside.”  SJ feels lighter and says he gets sad when he thinks he is not understood. Right now he is feeling understood.  He added, “Yes, Ms. Margie, I see that sharing the journey really helps. Tell the peeps thank you!”

May we listen to one another with deep compassion and understanding.

May we all acknowledge our truths and learn to trust that Chief Shepherd is always ready to meet our needs.

Happy Wednesday!

Ms. Margie and SJ (with some help from Solomon and Mr. John)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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