I am finally back. Yes, way too much time has flown by since my first foray into blogging. As often happens with us all, I have stood in my own way. Recently an old story came to mind. A parable of sorts.
A little girl was working happily with her father in the garden. The father was busy on his knees with his hands in the soil, weeding and planting. The little girl was helping her father by holding the hose to water the new plants. She was proud to help her father. Everything was going smoothly when suddenly she cried, “Daddy, the water won’t come out of the hose!” The father looked up from his work and in a split second could determine the problem. He said, “Honey, just take your foot off the hose and the water will flow again.”
Once again, I have been confronted with the truth that fear, worry, negative thoughts, and self-doubts are how we step on our own hose, blocking our creativity and joy. Do you step on your hose sometimes?
The parenting journey can bring major foot-on-the-hose moments.
Worries about our parenting and our children can bring us to our proverbial knees like nothing else.
It can happen in the chaos of everyday ups and downs in parenting ranging from toddler tantrums to teen traumas as well as in more serious situations. When worry dominates our thought fields it robs us of energy and often obscures clear thinking.
Such was the case recently when a worried parent came to my office for coaching. She is a delightfully honest and insightful mom. I was listening intently when she suddenly blurted out, “I am so good at worry I don’t want to give it up! I know how to do that.” We laughed together. She had come to a moment of decision. She chose to take her heavy foot of worry off the hose and called me later with pure joy in her voice at the outcome.
I saw myself in her. I remembered something I had once read, “Worry never climbed a hill. Worry never paid a bill. Worry never wiped a tear. Worry never calmed a fear… ”
It spurred me into action. I am all about calming people’s fears. Hmm.. . How can I calm my own? I enrolled in a program with a couple of life-giving coaches. They are are doing for me what I love to do for parents.
I am more certain than ever that when you feel understood, valued, and supported you step into your own personal power and live from a space of expansiveness vs. constriction. Your energy flows.
Once you have identified your worry, here are three steps to change negative energy (self-limiting and fearful thoughts which accumulate into what we call worry) into positive action and renewal:
Step 1. Change one thought
For me, it was the awareness that worry was not helping anyone ( including me).
Step 2. Change one word.
I changed the word “worry” into “wonder.”
Step 3. Do one small positive deed or action.
In my situation, I asked for help.
Step -by- step we can change the course of a stressful relationship or situation and turn from the well-worn worry path and take the path of wonder filled with curiosity, discovery, and delight.
It only takes one step, one word, one deed to change our direction. One turn on the freeway.
I wonder …
Yours for turning worry into wonder,
Margie