Summertime can be the season for “boo-boos.” 
At some point during the summer you can be pretty sure that many children (and adults) have sported a wound. Parents have likely scouted for ice cubes, cool cloths, fancy band aids, first aid cream, itch medicine etc. to apply to scraped knees, split open chins, bee stings and bumps and bruises of all sorts.
And there have likely been a lot of kisses offered to treat fears, tears, and pain.
Truthfully, I have been thinking about the process of healing this past summer. It became intensely personal when I was with my husband as he recovered from his surgery and then radiation burns and side effects.
Many of you know about this sort of thing from your own personal experiences.
While I know that this article may seem like a “duh” due to its apparently obvious nature, I have decided to share things that were good reminders for me and hopefully for you.
For the purpose of quick reading and assimilation I will write with bullet points. Your own minds can fill in the details from your personal knowledge and experience.
So what have I re-learned and savored this summer?
* “Boo boos” come in all forms.
From bumps and bruises to cuts and cancer, from nerve damage and diabetes, to heart ache and heart break we humans experience pain on many levels. But one thing that is consistently helpful for healing of any kind is having someone acknowledge your wound and respond to you kindly.
It is true for our children. They get hurt and they let us know. We rub the wound if appropriate or put ice on it if appropriate. But most of all we acknowledge it and make some kind of personal contact. Essentially, we kiss their boo boos.
It is also true for us adult children. Have you ever noticed how we want to show our friends our own wounds from surgery or other happenings? When in pain, it is helpful to have something to show for it because it makes it more believable.
But oh so much of our pain is not visible on the outside. So I have been reminded to be aware of hidden wounds. That is more difficult but equally important.
* Healing Also Comes in All forms.
As I shared the healing journey with Tom, I was reminded that healing is Mother Nature’s intention at all times. Our bodies seek wellness and what looks like inflammation or cancer or bruises is our body’s quick response to how our earth journey challenges it. But its drive is to be well.
Some simple healing tools that I observed are:
Gratitude: The more we focus on the power of healing, the better we are able to be grateful when it is hard to be grateful. And gratitude is a healing balm for many kinds of wounds, especially for wounds of the spirit.
Acknowledgement, Acceptance, and Validation: Healing is a community affair. Prayers, strong positive intentions focused on the wounded, good deeds, expressions of love and concern, and just a quiet presence are all tools we each have within us to help Mother Nature along in that drive for health and healing. It is the personal connection that we can give each other that carries the wounded over the threshold of healing on their darkest nights.
Humor, Fun, and Laughter are indispensable and invisible healing aids. We have likely all read about the well documented healing properties of laughter and I was reminded of how using humor can shift our perception and our experience.
Tom and I had one of those small shifts in perception when we named his melanoma. And that came about when we suddenly decided to thank it for its appearance as it sounded the battle cry by warning us that something was going wrong in his body. So while we thanked it for letting us know, we also knew it was a call for action. And the first action was immediate surgery. This leads to my following point.
* Awareness and Knowledge Lead to Appropriate Actions vs. Reaction:
When I took a close look at Tom’s wounds I was able to realize things we must do to help the healing process. Sometimes it was a matter of applying medicine and sometimes it meant a consult with an expert. But being aware and ready to learn helped us make good decisions.
I hope you are reading between the lines to realize I am using physical “boo boo” stories as a metaphor for the wounds we cannot see in others. Just being aware they exist makes us curious about how to respond. It is a first step. Learning how to acknowledge, accept, and respond to their needs often requires expert help and always requires an attitude of loving kindness.
Pain cannot be seen. It is unique to each individual and to each circumstance. It cannot be measured. But it can be validated and honored. When people’s behavior annoys us or when someone seems to be “over the top” with their behavior it is an expression of their personal and invisible pain.
* Taking Time to Observe and Listen to the Wounded May be key to Their Healing.
It is easy in our busy world to listen superficially or to assume that someone is feeling as well as they say they are or not feeling as badly as they sound. That depends on our judgment.
But we would do well to suspend judgment in either case and take the time to simply listen and learn. I learned that lesson also with Tom who tends to put on the brave front. At one point I realized I had best look at his radiation burn on his lower back where he could not see it. I was so glad I checked. He needed some treatment!
In summary, the simple tools mentioned above are ours to use on ourselves and with each other. I was simply reminded of the resilience of the human body and spirit built within us that can be encouraged and supported by each of us on our shared journeys.