While I deny making those proverbial New Year’s resolutions, heavens knows I have tried and tried to set goals. Although I am the better for it in some ways, my failure to follow through successfully has often derailed my sense of emotional well being. I am tired of setting goals and failing at them. But I both need and want to change several things about myself. I ask myself, “What will that take?” Can you relate to this cycle of promise-to-self followed by defeat?
What actually motivates me to change? What motivates you? Truthfully, I am desperate to change some things. What would help me to realize my own dreams and potential? I love people and care deeply about their journeys. I want them to experience all the success and joy they desire. And I want the same for myself. It seems that most of us want to change some things about ourselves, but change can be slow and challenging. It can also happen in a flash and be joyful.
I had a small awakening as 2012 slid onto the calendar. It occurred to me that I tend to change when I am inspired toward something greater than passing self-directed pleasure or increased self-esteem. I need to tap into meaningful change, change that will enrich others’ lives in spite of my own flaws and shortcomings. It comes from a desire to inspire parents as they face their challenges and to back up inspiration with good information whenever possible.
We all know that as parents we will change for our children’s sake when otherwise we might not be inclined to do so. Or we change to be better for someone we love. For example, Tom stopped smoking when we met and he had done so several times before then. He changed out of deep love and commitment for the well-being of our family and had been unsuccessful just doing it for himself.
In reality, all of us do set goals. Everyday all day. It involves all kinds of strategies and planning that are mostly subconscious. We don’t even realize we are using them.
Our goals are driven primarily by two basic truths about us: 1. we tend to move toward what we want. For example, we want things and experiences that help us live better, experience more ease, confidence, health, happiness, and comfort. We want to make things better for ourselves and our children. At the same time, 2. we try to avoid things that we fear or do not like. Yes,we really are goal setting people! So why is it short lived for most of us when we do it consciously and by choice each New Year?
In part it is because each of us respond to different stimuli and strategies. For some of us, writing lists and establishing goals feels like pressure. For others it is liberating. But what I discovered about myself is that I need inspiration to ignite the energy for change and information to fuel and sustain the energy for the transformations I desire.
Information and inspiration are as necessary together as the two hemispheres of our brain. Seeking and finding both information and inspiration has been a life long pursuit for me and moved me toward a life I love. It has carried me through times of suffering, confusion, discouragement, and fear. Now, how can I use this to leverage more change?
In thinking about this, I have come to realize that I love words. Mind you, just ordinary, everyday words. (My vocabulary is very user friendly). But words do give context (form) to our desires and spiritual quests, and as I have mentioned in the past, even changing one word can change our attitude and redirect our actions. I am also intrigued by short phrases. They stick with me.
“That’s it!” I said to myself. “I need words to inspire me in 2012!” Words can be the wind that gives flight to my dreams. I need a phrase of some sort to shape my goals for the new year.
Voila! These words came to me: Love, Live, & Let Go! To be totally honest, I need the “let go” part most.
Before writing to my TSJ community, I decided to play with these words for two weeks. And I am so excited to tell you that already things have changed.
So information needs inspiration to give it wings and inspiration needs information to give substance to our soul’s journey on the planet.
I am delighted that this feels good to me because that means it is in alignment with my deeper values. But let us all remember to strive for progress rather than perfection! I hope to “walk the talk” throughout this year, one step at a time. I will address what Love, Live, & Let Go mean to me in a future blog. What does it mean to you?