Dear TSJ Friends,
We certainly live in uncertain times! And uncertainty is difficult for us humans in the first place, even more so in our troubled world where the horrors of evil and war are in front of our eyes in real time with real people. All of this on top of the weariness of the pandemic points to how uncertainty can generate unrest of mind, heart and body!
Which brings me to today’s reflection.
Increasingly I have come to understand that our bodies tell our stories from physical, spiritual, and psychological perspectives.
One example on how we physically embody ( see definition at very bottom of page beneath Solomon) our life stories came to my mind while watching the Winter Olympics.
As spectators, we might find it hard to remember that the athletes’ triumphs often have been forged and refined through significant trials. But their bodies store their stories! As do ours.
In 2014 a book was published that caught my attention: The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma: (Bessel Van Der Kolk, MD). The timing was perfect for me. (I had heard Dr. Van Der Kolk speak when I was a school psychologist and it was one of the best professional development seminars I attended, so I was eager to get his book! )
My late husband Tom had died and I was immersed in grief and physical fatigue. I bought this book remembering Dr. Van Der Kolk and how he had embodied compassion and knowledge years before. He is a great listener and story teller!
Since then, there has been an enormous amount of research on our mind-body connection. And it is very helpful for all of us to become attentive to how our bodies register our physical and our mental and spiritual well being.
We embody our inner truth, our lived stories . . . generally unconsciously.
I know you know this already. So do I. But I needed the reminder this week, so I am sharing it with you.
I wonder, what story might you be embodying at this time?
My Story: TO SKI OR NOT TO SKI . . . (cross country skiing)
The sun was shining brilliantly showing off diamond-like crystals on the fresh snow. It was Monday afternoon. The air was still and crisp, The sky was blue. John and I had gone for a good walk in the morning and settled in for the day’s schedule.
But when afternoon came around the weather was even more enticing to be outdoors. John suddenly decided it would be a great afternoon for cross country skiing and began dressing for the occasion.
Hmm. I had planned to do some productive things that needed attention. But I hate to miss out on an opportunity to be outside with him and getting a bit of physical exercise and fresh air.
In the back of my mind, however, I remembered the last time we tried this ( two weeks ago) I had fallen just going down the slope of the back lawn. I lost control and fell backwards. Unhurt. He had to help me get the skis off so I could get up. I went back in the house and sent him on alone. Bummer.
So I hesitated, a bit fearful of repeating this but talked myself out of it. We looked out and figured a way I could go down at a different angle this time.
Determined to not allow my fear stop me from my fun, I bundled up and followed John’s lead across the lawn but he easily navigated the turn and I didn’t. I could not control my skies and did a face plant this time in the snow. My sunglasses were filled with snow and my left foot yelled “help.” I had fallen to the left side. My weaker side since back surgery.
Yes, our bodies do talk!
I don’t know about you but I often don’t listen or stubbornly choose to ignore its messages. I eat when my stomach says it is already full. I graze for chocolate or something to make me happy when I do not need it. I push through fatigue when a short rest would help. I eat foods I should not eat. How about you?
But more subtly, our bodies have recorded past traumas also.
Scientists and wellness practitioners urge us to practice mindfulness and relaxation techniques etc. to learn how to notice and listen to our bodies. Where is your tension stored etc.?
This time, I ignored my anxiety and hoped for the best. But once again I fell in my own back yard. John was exceedingly kind and patient helping me get my skis off and get back on my feet. I could stand and all my joints were working!
So I carried my skis to flat ground and we had a good time on the path behind our house. I did notice my left ankle was not happy but it seemed okay for awhile. I slid along and reveled in the fact that I was able to do so. I ignored the pain.
When we got home I realized I might be hurting even more on land than on skis. My foot cried out for attention. The ankle swelled and the pain surged. I nursed it properly and kept doing so for the next 24 hours. I gave it what it needed and by today I am able to walk quite well! The body loves to repair itself and protect us.
The things I have been reminded of and hope to embody in the future:
~~~It is wise to pay attention to our physical bodies. Notice where it hurts or when it is tired.
~~~It is wise to listen to how our bodies speak to us. Our bodies carry our inner worlds… our hearts, minds and soul! They shelter our stories until we are ready to face with courage the stories that need revising.
~~~It is wise to remember our bodies are interconnected and so are we. When one part of the body hurts the rest of the body is involved in caring for us! Just like a family or a community. When one hurts we all hurt in one way or another. We rally to each other’s unconscious cries for help or encouragement.
~~~It is wise to be kind to our bodies as it is spiritually and mentally healing for others too.
What kind of messages do you want to embody? Perhaps messages of kindness, patience, empathy, hope?
Finally, many of us spend a lot of energy speaking and thinking disparaging thoughts about our bodies. What if we replaced negative thoughts with kind thoughts and actions toward our bodies? After all, they house our souls!
Maybe this season of Lent is a good time to begin.
With love,
Margie and the TSJ muse Solomon
****EMBODY | əmˈbädē | verb (embodies, embodying, embodied) [with object] 1 be an expression of or give a tangible or visible form to (an idea, quality, or feeling): a team that embodies competitive spirit and skill. • provide (a spirit) with a physical form.
Copied from the internet dictionary